I would like to be pregnant ALL the time.
There. I said it. I want to be pregnant. All. The. Time.
I LOVE it. I miss it.
Yes, I love being a mommy to my 8-month-old Benjamin – even as he’s screaming because I can’t shovel the yogurt in fast enough. But I would be happy having him AND still being pregnant.
I feel like I’m in the minority, though. I know women like being pregnant because they love being a mommy and it’s only moderately inconvenient (for most). But I LOVED it. I had the feeling that most women describe – one of strength. I mean, I was GROWING something. Inside me. I was never alone. We were creating this unbreakable bond.
But it goes beyond that. I can’t remember a time I felt so good – and healthy. Sure, I wasn’t eating as well as I could have – Baby wanted Oreos and milk every night – but I was active and eating as many fruits and veggies as appealed to me. I was working out at Orangetheory Fitness 2-4 times a week till week 39 (I would have gone longer, but I didn’t want pay for a month that I mostly wouldn’t be able to use). My migraines were gone, finally. My head was always clear. There was no fog, and there was no worry of one popping up. The random swelling of my lower legs disappeared. I wasn’t gaining weight all over. My energy was up. It seemed like all the negative things associated with pregnancy (that I was prone to before pregnancy) didn’t happen to me.
I had braced for the worst – but I had also prepared for the best. I was in the best shape of my life while trying to get pregnant. I was fit and healthy and happy. I knew I had to approach pregnancy with a positive attitude so if I was miserable, I wasn’t that miserable.
Too many women seem to hate pregnancy – or feel like they SHOULD hate pregnancy. You are turning your body over to something else. You gain weight. Nothing fits. You crave weird things. Nothing sounds appetizing, etc. But it’s OK to not hate pregnancy. It’s OK to love it. It’s OK to be THAT pregnant woman. It’s OK to have a great pregnancy and to talk about it and post about it (the ones who hate it do. Why can’t we show the other side?)
Finding a kindred spirit
I was at the zoo the other day with a friend I made in child birth class. Our kids are 3 weeks apart. We hadn’t seen each other since class, but we’d kept in touch via social media. We were comparing birth stories, laughing about how class doesn’t prepare you for how it really goes down. Then I asked the question I know I should never ask (because I hate it being asked of me): “Do you want more kids?”
Her response surprised me: “Yes, because I loved being pregnant.” I just looked at her. She saw my face and quickly followed up with “but that’s not a reason to have more.” I told her that I would consider having another (after always thinking I wanted one because I was sure my pregnancy wouldn’t be enjoyable.) She started listing why she missed being pregnant. Her list could have been my list. I had finally found someone who truly felt the way I did, and she wasn’t just saying it because it was what a mom is expected to say. It was refreshing to have an honest conversation about pregnancy, one that didn’t focus on baby, but on mom.
I’ve been fortunate to be surrounded by moms who have had happy, healthy pregnancies. But they aren’t always the voices you hear. One negative comment about pregnancy (yours or theirs or their fifth cousin’s dog walker) can make you question how you should be feeling about your that stage in life. You should feel how you want to feel.
Maybe it was because Hubby, friends and strangers always said positive things to me and about me. Maybe it was because my pants still fit and I didn’t really gain weight elsewhere. Maybe it was because I was still in the gym. Maybe it was because little in my life changed – other than the fact I was carrying around a 9-pound basketball all the time. Maybe it was because I finally blocked negativity.
None of that hurt, that’s for sure. But at the end of it all, I think I loved my pregnancy because I didn’t expect to even like it, let alone love and miss it. Carrying a baby was amazing, and I’d do it again tomorrow. I’m one of the lucky ones.